Who is responsible for our feelings?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=79iPMEG_4i0   (is this the right video?) It does not matter.

In the Q&A section the burka clad person states that she is offended by something said by Lawrence. That struck me as odd, and I had to think about what was odd about it.

She inferred the responsibility for her feelings were outside of herself. That is odd to my thinking. I am responsible for what I feel, regardless of where the input is from. Authorities are only authorities if I give them that power. We control our own feelings. We cannot be mentally harmed by outside verbal abuse, and if it does not agree with our worldview, we should ignore it or leave. Feeling offended is a passive aggressive attack, trying to hit back at the source of the statement. It shows a different way of thinking that is part of the problem. Most of us rational people would not be offended, we would just right off the statement or concept as noise, and disagree and feel nothing.

It all comes back to rational vs. emotional processing of inputs from the external world.

Also leaving is only possible if we are or can be independent. If religion is keeping us down, we have a second problem. Islam is one of those religions, and that is the problem. It developers followers and users who lead. That is the ultimate cause of brainwashed terrorists. The do not understand that death is final. This is the only life we get.

Of course, I am an asshole who does not let the emotions of others effect me much. If the other was the case, that I could not question anything, without risking hurting others feelings, we could say very little. But that was the way I was raised, and typically is the way of religion. We live in a noisy universe, ever asshole has an opinion. Many things are going to offend each of us. The only rational way is to not be offended by ugly noise trying to be an input. That is my responsibility.

Eh, that is what the old stoic said perhaps. What manner of appearance (perception) is this before us? Not real, but a perception of the nature or a manifestation of the unreal? (Paraphrased) A dream, or a ugly noise, a perception of nature, or proposition that we can test, assent to, hold in abeyance or reject, or just noise.

Is that also what they refer to as nothing external can harm us after we have built our inner citadel in our mind. We must separates physical injure from concept or mental stress, called harm. This is a translation issue of specific exact terminology of  Greek to the sloppy English language.

But what do I know?